Maybe your own dignity is something that shouldn’t ever be compromised unless it’s in defense of someone else’s dignity. Cleaning up someone else’s mess is demeaning, unless it’s to save the dignity of whoever eventually has to do it. Getting your ass beat is demeaning, unless it’s to defend someone else from getting their ass beat.
and so on
It’s frightening to think about how fast your mind adapts to fit the circumstances.
Two days ago, I was lying on the warm Philippine bed, with nothing on my mind but my grandparents, my nephews, seeing my best friend Martin, and all the books I’ve been reading. I was fully in vacation-mode, with nothing but family and relaxing on my mind.
I’ve been in Stony for less than 12 hours, and the Philippines already feels like a distant memory. I’ve spend almost all of my waking moments planning RA stuff, moving in, wondering about my classes, how Stony Brook has changed, etc. In an instant, my whole mindset, thoughts, and attitude that I had in the Philippines changed completely the moment I moved back into college.
I don’t know how to feel about this
Maybe it’s not just that confidence is so attractive, but also that lack of confidence is so unattractive.
Piece by piece, I’m slowly forging another piece of my identity, rooted in the history, culture, and struggles of the Philippine people. It’s one of the first times I ever felt a mature and heartfelt connection to the Philippines and its destiny.
If you offer someone alcohol and they refuse, the correct response is “Okay :)”
"But come on! It’s my birthday!"
"Do it for me!"
"But I wanna get you drunk :D"
It’s hard to write when you don’t know what you want to say. But maybe getting over that hurdle is what makes one’s writing meaningful in the first place.
I wonder if I’ll achieve that any time soon