I understand that I’m surrounded by friends and family who love me dearly. But I still get anxious when I make decisions that could potentially result in someone else disliking me, especially authoritative figures like professors and doctors and other professionals.
There’s a constant battle within me, since I want to remain kind and nice to everyone I meet. I feel good when others feel good. But more importantly, I feel good when others like me.
It sounds like a childish problem to have. I know it’s not though. Maybe I should follow in my mom’s footsteps, since she’s someone who will start a fight with the whole fucking world, if it’s not giving her what she wants and feels like she deserves. I’m getting sick of my obedience to my own social paralysis.
/rusty writing, relevant issue